Your Ninth Year

Dear Luke, 

You've completed your ninth trip around the sun.  Wow!  This year has contained some pretty incredible moments, but then again, each of the past nine years has been exceptional since the moment we first laid eyes on you, our precious first born son.   There are many sports analogies written about a child's ninth birthday.  I've seen it referred to as "halftime" in parenting... We've coached you through the first half of your childhood and made a great team, but there are only nine short years before you take this game all on your own.   Some will say that now we're approaching the "back 9", and this is our moment to pause and high five, and change our game plan a little.  During this second half of parenting, the focus will gradually shift from basics and life skills (where we've called all the shots so far), to you calling more plays for yourself and choosing your own path.   We're getting glimpses of this already, as you have much more pronounced opinions about certain things, and have visibly grown and matured this year. 

 If someone had told me that during your ninth year, you'd toss aside the beloved plaid shorts and polo shirts that you've worn your whole life, and ask to wear "sweatpants (athletic clothes) like everyone else", I would have scoffed.  (And I would have been ashamed that on the first morning you insisted on wearing these to school that I may have shouted, "WE WEAR THOSE AS PAJAMAS IN THIS FAMILY!").  I later apologized to you... because it was really about me losing control and you growing up too fast... and not about the clothes at all.

If someone had showed me that in the second half of your ninth year, you'd fall in love with Harry Potter, and read the entire series not once, but twice, I would have been amazed.  Because that's 8,448 pages since January (according to Scholastic Books).  You were exposed to some grown up content for the first time while reading these books, and recently came to me and whispered, "Mommy, there's a bad word in Harry Potter."  I replied, "Yes, but you're a big kid now, and you can handle it," while praying that I was saying right thing, words that would make you feel confident in my trust of you.  Then there was the evening when I went into your room to tuck you in, and found tears in your eyes.  "Mommy, did you know that Dobby (a beloved HP character) dies in this book?"   I had completely forgotten to prepare you for this, and as I held you, I talked about the magic of books, and what a gift it is that an author can make us fall in love with fictional characters so that our hearts hurt for them... how proud I was that you were such a voracious reader... and how that would serve as a gift for your whole life.  Meanwhile, my heart broke for you, my baby, who, just one instant ago, listened to "Good Night Moon" as I read it aloud to you, snuggled in my lap in a rocking chair. 

If someone had warned me that your ninth year would be a time where Daddy and I would be faced with important decisions about your schooling, I would have been incredulous.  Because it's only third grade, and surely you are supposed to be a kid and enjoy elementary school for a few more years, right?  You were blessed with the gift of an extraordinary brain, and this was the year where we received official validation of that through aptitude and achievement test scores that blew our minds (but didn't surprise us).   We prayed and thanked God for the opportunities that this presented us, and made the decision that we felt was best for you and for our family.  We want you to continue to grow and learn in a constructive, nurturing environment that will allow you to socially thrive and succeed, and we've worked very hard this year on developing and maturing these skills.  You're a happy little boy, who is funny and brilliant, and will tell jokes and share trivia and facts with any audience that will listen.  We are thankful for teachers, counselors, family, and friends who have mentored and supported us along this journey during the past year.          

If someone had whispered to me that in your ninth year, you'd still be the tallest in your grade, that your feet would be as big as mine, and that I'd catch a glimpse of what you'll look like as an adult, I would have buried my head in the sand.  Thankfully, you are still extremely affectionate with your mama, and ask me to snuggle you every day.  You let me kiss you, hold your hand, and breathe in your heavenly scent (I know that won't last during the "back 9" as you become a stinky teenager!).  You still love Legos and Pokemon, and your ninth year was filled with milestones and growing experiences.  You taught me how to deal with disappointment this year when you didn't get a spot in the School Talent Show (a moment in your ninth year that was much harder for me than you)... you got your first stitches when you crashed into the bleachers... you continued your adventurous eating habits by consuming more food than the rest of us combined, and want to try every restaurant that you see (we caved and went to Arby's and KFC for the first time this year, which you thought was an amazing treat!).  You're becoming much more interested and engaged while watching college and professional sports teams.  This was our favorite year to watch the Super Bowl with you, to complete March Madness brackets, and it's a great, great sports stage.  You play soccer and basketball, and are amazingly resilient in so many aspects (which adults could truly learn from, as you bounce back from 0-11 sports seasons, and truly do focus on the fun and not the competitiveness).  Your favorite phrase is "I have just ONE question", which you utter about 727 each day, and your inquisitive, curious mind never, ever stops processing, thinking, or wondering.  

As we pause for a moment for this halftime pep talk, we want you to remember and know that each day of your ninth year was filled with love and joy.   You are a gift to this world and the center of our universe. The next nine years will have many new experiences for you to navigate, but Daddy and I will always be here for you, and want you to know that the best is yet to come.  You will always be our all-star.

Love, Mommy